End of the Road is Near

Well, time is running thin, and there is still plenty of things that I need to do. Looks like this road is coming to an end soon.

My piece featuring Reg is in design. I'm preparing for the Hermitage Museum; hopefully I'll make it in and win something. I'm aware that it is really naive to depend on such a risky event with so much optimism. But how else am I suppose to look at it? If I'm too realistic and analytical, my self-esteem would surely be crippled by it. The last thing I want to think is that my work won't amount to everyone else's, and that what I envision in my future is meaningless. I seriously don't want to trip myself into depression. Not at this important point in my life.

So I guess it is time to face Master Chief and Captain at NJROTC and return all of my stuff. They will not be happy to see my ass, I can say that right now. Ha ha. But it's something that has to be done, or else I have to pay for all of it, which would amount to $225; this is money I am not willing to fork over.

SOLs have started again, and I'm confident I passed the Algebra 1 test that I never took (I was supposed to have taken it 3 years ago, but I wasn't in VA in 2004). I still need to speak with Mercer about my Analysis grade, which has been appearing as a E instead of a D, which is what it actually and rightfully is! Thinking about it makes my blood boil! On top of this, Gallop still has my cap & gown. I really need to get myself straight.

AADS starts tomorrow. I wonder how it's going to go down. I'm a little worried that once I get my "temporary" DL, that I won't be here when they mail my actual DL to my house. I'm sure I would have moved to CT by then. Driving to CT with only a 90 day temp DL... sounds so retarded. God help my poor self.

I shall blog again, hopefully with good tidings.

Perplexed

I seriously lack motivation, it's not even funny.

Two days ago, I submitted my short story "Sketch" into the literary festival via my english teacher. I actually wrote it almost two years ago. All it needed was some editing, but it still was a very nice piece. Honestly, it was the only school aproppiate story I've ever written. All the others are more zealous and less kind-hearty. The horror and thriller genre are not school administrative friendly.

Okay, here are the things I am hoping to accomplish between today and the summer (June) : build up some badly needed muscle mass, get my artwork into the Hermitage Art Musuem and win prizes, get into the Fine Arts Festival, straighten my situation with my scores and SOLs, contact Hartford Art School and MCC, and update my wardrobe. Yes, it is necessary. Ha ha!

I'm still in the waiting room. When the hell is it going to be my turn?

What Dreams May Bring

Now, I've had some pretty weird-ass dreams in the past. You know, like the one time I dreamt that I was getting chased by life sized fruits (apples, bananas, pears, grapes, etc.) on a really big kitchen counter-top and I ran for the sink in hopes of losing the giant fruits in the hot soapy water.

What the fuck was that all about?

Who knows.

All I need to focus on right now is me. Don't even think about Connecticut until the time comes. It's almost guruanteed that I'll be getting my DL on May 1st, so I have that to look forward to. Working and schooling is all I should do within these next 7-8 weeks.

Life

It's such a cruel mistress.

So everything seems to be going smoothly. Haven't heard from Mr. Rudivich yet, which means I'll probably be visiting him in the "Tower" sometime tomorrow. Jesus help me.

My struggles with employment might be mended by Lizzy, who might be able to get me a job. Of course, I'll only have this job for 2 months, seeing as how I am moving back to Connecticut. And that's if I actually apply, get an interview, and then get hired. But I feel comfortable in a gaming environment, so yeah. Hopefully this works out.

Whipped out the ol' Fire Emblem: The Sacred Stones a couple of days ago and started playing it. Helluva fun game, but it pisses me off at the same time.

I've noticed something just a bit odd. The Chinese zodiac is interesting, and surprisingly accurate. I'm not one to become quickly guillable and believe in this kind of supersticious jargon, but it has been making me wonder. I was born in 1989, the year of the Snake, and the description for "snake" males fits me perfectly. I guess I find it amusing, thats all.

When the Ball starts Rolling...

Finally found where I could get a D.E. Roll card! Apparently Mr. Hanes had them, and Jasmine was nice enough to direct me to his office. It's easy enough; all I have to do is fill it out and then give it to a secretary in the main office where they will place in Mr. Rudivich's mail box. Mr. Rudivich... what a funny name. I'm sure I'm spelling it wrong, but who's going to complain? Besides, I hear the dude is always in "the Tower", surveying the surrounding traffic, like some crazy hermit who sits on top of his mountain, where he looks down on the world below. Insane stuff is going on there, let me tell you. Any way, I'm am just going to have to be patient and wait until I somehow get word from Mr. Rudivich, or I could visit him in his natural domain, "the Tower". I dread the day.

So tomorrow, I am going to ask Brandon for information about the The Tucker House, specifically for employment. Hey, what I'm thinking is, if they hired Nathan, then they should hire me. No offense to you Nathan, of course, but that is my logic. Hopefully Brandon doesn't shoot me down.

A while ago, I spoke with Brooks. Well, more like he started talking and I had no choice but to listen. He's an interesting character though. Brooks talked about his beliefs in relationships, and what he would do in certain situations. I take it that Brooks represents a majority of what men would do in their relationships, and it turns out I'm very different. Maybe it's just that Brooks hasn't reached that level of maturity. I have more morals, expectations, and standards. There are just some things I could never do if I were with someone. I'll leave it at that.

We shall see what happens in the days to come.

The Fool of April: Musings of Today

It's been interesting to see what would happen when I finally became active. I can see now that my lack of motivation to do the things I need to do is having its consequences. I maybe unintentionally pissing people off, and I'm so sorry if I am. I have no clue what I'm doing wrong. Hence, I am a fool.

I really wonder if my mannerisms and my body language tell people a different story. I don't think it does. I know what I want to tell someone, and I know how to say it or do it. I'm never stuck in between, or at least that is what I think. I would hate to send someone the wrong message.

My stomach hasn't been my best friend as of late. Its been troubling me for the past week, and I don't know what the hell is up with it. I hope its not a virus, because there won't be any fun times there.

Whatever. I think I'm just being moody. I hope I don't turn into some sort of madman, hah ha. Hanging in there is all there is to do. And I'll do just that.